On Happiness and Self-Realization

The Soviet propaganda slogan "All roads lead to happiness because all roads lead to Communism"[1] was hammered into people's minds like iron nails. Today those nails have rusted and crumbled to dust, only to be replaced by new myths: the cult of success, consumerism, and commercialized spiritual practices. Yet I have no desire to replace old dogmas with new ones, even golden ones. Instead, I propose examining this question through the lenses of psychology and philosophy—not to impose my views, but simply to share them.

People struggle to define happiness because they habitually associate it with socio-cultural constructs—thought paradigms, mental frameworks and behavioral patterns imposed by society. However useful these constructs may be, they remain relative, being products of specific cultures in specific historical periods—ontologically, they are ultimately illusions.

For ideological Communists, happiness equaled Communism. For Americans, it means achieving the American Dream (the cult of career and wealth). In 19th century Britain and Japan, happiness was associated with honor (hence the ideals of the gentleman and samurai). Yet Amazonian tribes, the Sentinelese[2], Buddhists and Hindus have completely different conceptions of happiness. Buddhists find it in the absence of desire, Amazonian tribes in harmony with nature. The Ubuntu philosophy of South Africa counters Western individualism with "I am because we are." Interestingly, some languages lack the very concept of "happiness"—the Tsimane people of Bolivia speak instead of "the good life," meaning healthy children and a successful hunt.

Yet across all cultures and eras runs a common thread—humanity's metaphysical striving to "create itself," transcending biological evolution. The forms this self-realization takes may differ radically, but the fundamental impulse remains. Even in secular society, the cult of self-improvement functions as a kind of "religion for atheists."

Thus we might define happiness as the joy of progressing toward genuine self-realization, of approaching one's authentic ideal self. This path has no end—one can never declare "That's it, my self-realization is complete."

However, like happiness itself, self-improvement can become just another social construct where the "self" is illusory—merely following behavioral stereotypes approved by a given culture[3]. When the "ideal self" is something like "successful entrepreneur" or "celebrity" (purely social constructs), pursuing it inevitably leads to burnout—that moment of existential emptiness when one realizes they've been playing someone else's role.

True happiness requires looking inward, beyond external standards and others' opinions. Some guidance for this journey comes from psychologists and philosophers:

Viktor Frankl taught that people need not comfort but meaning, found through creativity, experience, and attitude toward suffering.

Advaita Vedanta offers the "Who am I?" method—discarding imposed identities.

Replacing "I should" with "I choose" statements.

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's concept of "flow"—activities so engaging that time disappears[4].

The Japanese wabi-sabi philosophy finds beauty in imperfection.

Ultimately, the choice isn't between Communism and the American Dream, but between imposed values and one's quiet truth. As Erich Fromm asked: "To have or to be?" The answer may be our compass to genuine happiness—not in achieving some abstract ideal, but in progressing toward one's unique self-realization. This endless journey demands not becoming someone, but hearing oneself beneath society's myths. As Nietzsche urged: "Become who you are"—but first, you must remember who that is. Perhaps happiness lies precisely in this ongoing search.