Sandbox Humor

First-grade class in Brooklyn comes in from recess. Teacher asks Sarah: "What did you do at recess?"

[fɜːst greɪd klɑːs ɪn ˈbruklɪn kʌmz ɪn frɒm rɪˈses. ˈtiːʧə ɑːsks ˈseərə : wɒt dɪd jʊ duː æt rɪˈses?]

Sarah says, "I played in the sand box."

[ˈseərə sez, аɪ ˈpleɪd ɪn ðə sænd bɒks.]

Teacher says, "That's good. Go to the blackboard, and if you can write 'sand' correctly, I'll give you a fresh-baked cookie."

[ˈtiːʧə sez, ðæts gʊd. gəʊ tə ðə ˈblækbɔːd, ənd ɪf jʊ kæn rаɪt sænd kəˈrektlɪ, аɪl gɪv jʊ ə freʃ beɪkt ˈkʊkɪ.]

She does and gets a cookie. Teacher asks Morris what he did at recess.

[ʃiː dʌz ənd gets ə ˈkʊkɪ. ˈtiːʧə ɑːsks ˈmɒrɪs wɒt hiː dɪd æt rɪˈses.]

Morris says, "I played with Sarah in the sand box."

[ˈmɒrɪs sez, аɪ ˈpleɪd wɪð ˈseərə ɪn ðə sænd bɒks.]

Teacher says, "Good. If you write 'box' correctly on the blackboard, I'll give you a fresh-baked cookie."

[ˈtiːʧə sez, gʊd. ɪf jʊ rаɪt bɒks kəˈrektlɪ ɒn ðə ˈblækbɔːd, аɪl gɪv jʊ ə freʃ beɪkt ˈkʊkɪ.]

Morris does, and gets a cookie. Teacher then asks Mustaffa Abdul Machmoud what he did at recess.

[ˈmɒrɪs dʌz, ənd gets ə ˈkʊkɪ. ˈtiːʧə ðen ɑːsks (Mustaffa Abdul Machmoud) wɒt hiː dɪd æt rɪˈses.]

He says, "I tried to play with Sarah and Morris, but they threw rocks at me."

[hiː sez, аɪ trаɪd tə pleɪ wɪð ˈseərə ənd ˈmɒrɪs, bʌt ðeɪ θruː rɒks æt miː.]

Teacher says, "Threw rocks at you? That sounds like blatant racial discrimination. If you can go to the blackboard and write 'blatant racial discrimination' I'll give you a cookie."

[ˈtiːʧə sez, θruː rɒks æt jʊ? ðæt sаʊndz lаɪk ˈbleɪtənt ˈreɪʃəl dɪsˌkrɪmɪˈneɪʃən. ɪf jʊ kæn gəʊ tə ðə ˈblækbɔːd ənd rаɪt ˈbleɪtənt ˈreɪʃəl dɪsˌkrɪmɪˈneɪʃən аɪl gɪv jʊ ə ˈkʊkɪ.]

До встречи!

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Алексей Винидиктов
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